The KGM website is "browser neutral": Hence stressful HTML, DHTML & CSS tags, complicated Java Scripts and similar items which are not fully supported by inefficient web browsers from the Dark Side of the Force, such as Netscape Navigator and the AOL browser :-) are not used.

Ditto for frames, beams, girders and other construction materials, which are all prone to rust !

The KGM website is "PC neutral": Hence "best viewed at" screen sizes and/or  resolutions need not be specified. The KGM web site can usually be viewed as intended on most computer screens, unless you still have a steam-powered PC or a James Bond watch-computer designed  by Q!

You can also view our web site in your underwear. We won't tell. Promise.

Loading time shall be as rapid as possible: Hence the use of graphics and background images is kept to a minimum (preferably avoided altogether), so the main page will still look reasonably attractive, but it will take less than 25 seconds to load on a Jurassic period 28.8k modem and less than 15 seconds to load on a 56k modem.

Visitors living in the 21st century (whenever the hell it started !), with access to broadband services can go zoom-zoom-zoom in about 6 seconds!

In any case, as the images are loading, there is plenty of text to read. OK, not very exciting text but, hey, what do you expect for slave labour, huh ? 

You want a sexier web site ? Send money. Preferably small, unmarked bills.

Content is more important than gimmicks: Hence "Macromedia Flash" and "Shockwave" elements, annoying moving and/or blinking messages, pop-up windows, marquee messages, scrolling status bar messages, multi-colour pages fading-in and fading-out, animated GIFs and a splash page are not used, nor do you have to download anything in order to view our web site.

However the Webmaster is admittedly starting to weaken in respect of "Macromedia Flash" - guess it must be his industrial strength Prozac kicking in !! 

Nonetheless, if and when the Webmaster does offer "flash", it will be an option from the standard main page and not one of those annoying "flash splash" pages which load by default, whereby you have to "skip intro" to avoid seeing the animation a zillion times. Very annoying!

No cookies: Or milk. Ever. The Webmaster believes that you should be able to "enjoy your on-line experience" without the need for him to place electronic "Oreos" inside your computer.

Now if there was a way to store beer and pizza on your computer, that would be a different story !

No "cookie-cutters" either: Our club is unique, and so is our web site, so we don't follow the crowd and use a "cookie cutter" Rotary Club web site template. Uh-uh. No way, Jose ! We have a ball doing what we do to help the needy in our community and we believe our success lies in being a fun club.

Music is not forced upon visitors: When  you visit our website, music does not load automatically in the background. The webmaster, despite being a self-declared "really nice guy" and bon vivant, firmly believes that Webmasters of Rotary Club web sites which automatically play the excessively overused "R-O-T-A-R-Y" song on loading should be taken outside and shot. Twice.

However a selection of MIDI files, a welcome message and numerous other sound files which can be played at the visitor's option, primarily for comic relief, are available.

What ? You really want to hear the "R-O-T-A-R-Y" song ??  OK, just click here ! See, it's an option!

Navigation must be simple: Hence all internal and external hyperlinks (including most images), will open in a new window, so that less experienced web surfers won't "get lost". The main page always remains visible in the background. 

Elissa Cohen, if you are reading this, stop eating peanuts and say "Thank you, dahhhhling" :-)

Of course all key hyperlinks are available at the top of the page, so that repeat visitors do not need to "scroll down".

The KGM web site is easily located: Although the actual web site address is www.rckgm.org, the most common variants of the address, namely www.rckgm.com and www.rckgm.net have also been registered, and these are automatically hyper-linked to the correct address. 

In fact, one day we plan to list www.rckgm.com on the NYSE ("Noo Yark" Stock Exchange). Unlike most other "dot coms", we have never lost money nor have we ever laid off staff ! Hmmm. Maybe this would make our IPO seem unattractive ?

Anyway the KGM web site also has appropriate "meta tags", it has been listed with all major "search engines", and it features prominently for searches using the obvious keywords "rotary hong kong" and "rotary kowloon".

All images have "ALT" tags: This is a elementary website design protocol which many webmasters overlook. OK, I realise you have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about but, trust me, this is a good thing, especially for visitors with impaired vision who use text-to-voice conversion software.

OK, I'll explain. If you hover your mouse pointer over this image you will see that a little box will appear with the name of, or a comment about, the image.

All pages have "Titles": No, I don't mean "Dr.", "Sir" or "Grand Pubah". I mean web site stuff, OK ? 

Look at the very top of this page. See where it says "RCKGM Webmaster's Philosophy" ? This is particularly useful for visitors who use our "Site Map" feature. Still confused ? Please go away.

All pages are painstakingly checked for spelling errors: The Webmaster also knows the difference between "you're", "your", "yaw" and "yore", unlike some people he knows. 

Then again, the Webmaster is admittedly advantaged, having graduated from Mrs. McGillicuddy's kindergarten class with honours and a reasonably clean nappy (Class of 1960).

Hyperlinks are checked weekly: There is nothing more annoying to a regular web surfer than having a bunch of dead links ! 

OK, maybe browser lock-up (and really long hairs sticking out of your ears), is more annoying, but stop being so argumentative, will ya !?

Tasteful humour is essential: Although the work we undertake to assist our local and international communities is very serious, there is absolutely no reason why our website (and our club !!), cannot be enjoyable, while providing important information. 

Besides, I'm the Webmaster, I have the passwords and I'm out of industrial-strength Prozac, so :-p

By the way, the Webmaster joined Rotary in 1989 when the Rotary International annual theme was "Enjoy Rotary" and, in his mind, there has never been a better theme since.

Information shall always be accurate and up-to-date: There is no point in maintaining a web site full of useless and/or outdated information, now is there ? All necessary changes and updates are effected within a maximum of 8 hours but usually within 2 hours of knowing about them.

Hello ? HELLO ? Anybody out there in District 3450 listening ? Hello ? Waaaaay ? Mushi-mushi ?

Web Tools: In case you're interested, the Webmaster originally used "Notepad" to write all the pages of this website in raw HTML when he was merely a Web Slave, but he now uses MS FrontPage 2000 to publish them instead of FTP.

However he continues to use the HTML tab section of FrontPage 2000 to edit the pages, because the "Normal" tab doesn't always remove unwanted HTML tags properly.

Your Excellency, Bill Gates, if you're reading this, I really didn't mean to be critical, OK? However, if you get a chance, please ask your development team to stop counting their share options and solve this problem. Thank you, Your Highness !